Cleanup in Aisle 11

Those close to me will know I’ve always been a hard worker. I got my start very young, working in a popular supermarket and the story below is by far my most prized memory.

When you gotta go, you gotta go. That phrase holds true for most people’s bathroom tendencies but what happens when the porcelain throne isn’t the one in the comfort of your own house?

Well in this case, one man thought it would be okay to drop his pants in aisle 11 of the supermarket and take a crap into a trash can. I understand old age brings less control of these movements, but this dude wasn’t even graying yet. This guy walked down the aisle, made sure no one was around and pulled his khakis to his ankles. NO shame.

He then pulls up his pants and strolls away pushing his cart like it’s another day getting groceries. The best part of all this? HE WAS ON CAMERA. Like hello dude there are cameras everywhere in the supermarket. What’s meant to catch shoplifters shoving razor blades and raw meat into their pockets just caught this genius dropping some butt nuggets in the pet food aisle.

I think the grossest part of this whole story is that he pulled up his pants and went about his day WITHOUT wiping. Like that’s just nasty. How do you push your cart through the checkout line, interact with the cashier, and then sit in your car and drive home knowing what you just did? What happens when he takes off his underwear, like is he proud of those skid marks? Ugh, just ugh.

Keep it classy people and please, for the sake of supermarket shoppers everywhere, keep it in the public bathroom.

Just living life and loving every moment. Just Jordyn. 


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